Cumpleanos Feliz

"Morning sugarplum! Rise and shine!" Theo greeted in a sing song voice as he barged his way into his sister's room. "Happy birthday! Today you should be well excited because today is the day that you can get whatever you want out of me and I can't complain because it's your birthday and I have to be nice to you!"

He tore open the curtains and beamed as light fell across the room. "So hurry up and shake a leg because I have to fulfill a brotherly duty and I haven't got you a present yet cos I know whatever I get you you will scorn unless you choose it! Come on Princess! Hurry uppppp!"

Ah. Theo loved birthdays. More than anything he enjoyed annoying Rhea, though he would in truth be happy to buy her whatever she wanted. Provided it wasn't too expensive. Or stupid. Or painful. In fact, if he could get a drink out of it, he would be pretty happy.

Rhea groaned and buried her face in her pillow. "Shut up, I'm sleeping." she moaned and hugged her duvet closer. The wake-up was not appreciated. Though the mention of birthdays did get her a bit excited.

"I really shouldn't have gone drinking yesterday. I don't fancy being hungover on the best day of the year." Rhea sighed as she removed the pillow from her face and sat up, shielding her eyes from the light with her hand once Theo had opened the curtains. She wasn't sure if she loved him or hated him. "You haven't gotten me a present already? I have to pick my own present? What kind of brother are you! I can't do all the work." she shook her head, kicking duvet on the floor and scrambling out of bed.

"Oh my gosh, I'm sixteen." it seemed to be only dawning on her as she stared at herself in the mirror and combed through her hair with her fingers. "I'm sixteen, Theo! Oh my god, this is amazing. I'm sixteen." she turned to look at her brother, her smile growing. "I'm sixteen!"

"Oooh, mardy," Theo said with a grin, pulling her duvet from her and laughing a little. "Why do I even try to be nice to you if you're not even cheery on your birthday? God, Rhea. And of course I haven't got you a present yet. Whatever I'd have got you would have been wrong because you don't have as awesome a taste as me. Oooh we could go shopping!"

He nodded with a smirk as she repeated her age. "Yup! You can finally shag legally. And before you say anything, you knew it was bound to come up. Almost all grown up, Rhee! Only a year younger than me for a while, damn it." He lifted up a shoe on the floor, examining it. "Hey, this is pretty. Where's the other one? Gosh, why are your feet so small? If I was into drag I'd have to borrow these."

"Saying I'm not cheery is not being nice to me on my birthday." Rhea pouted, running a hand through her hair in hope to untangle it a little. "Going shopping with you isn't being nice either." she grinned, the mention of presents making her very happy, even if he hadn't picked them himself, at least that meant she was bound to like what ever she got. "I'll have to think about this one hard. What do I want? Maybe something that will leave you utterly broke and make you beg or more money from our parents."

She frowned at him. "Well, at least now you have to stay off my case, right? You're not allowed to tell me I'm too young anymore, ha! Life is good. Life is good." she shook her head at him, eying the shoe in his hand and trying to imagine them on his feet. The image caused her to giggle slightly. "You're so camp." she shook her head again, holding her hand out for the shoe. "I'm wearing that. And don't even think about trying it on, you'll break it. Give it."

"Why is going shopping with me not nice?!" Theo exclaimed, smirking. "I have great taste. I'd get you loads of nice clothes and you'd look amazing and oh my God give me thirty seconds to go and emasculate myself and then come back to me." He shook his head, grinning, before sitting on her bed and crossing one leg over the other. "Hurry up, I'm getting bored of waiting."

He put his hands up and dropped the shoe into her hand. "Alright, Cinderella. I can't believe you would accuse me of breaking it. I would never do such a thing. Anyway, what are we going to do? Pizza? I could eat pizza. Chinese? Indian? Your choice. Not fish though. Never fish."

"I don't know if I trust your taste." Rhea replied, shaking her head at her brother. "Do you shop for yourself? Why are you not wearing a pink shirt with glitter?"

"Your monster feet will make a puzzle piece out of my pretty shoes." Rhea explained, before walking towards her closet, the shoe in hand.

She turned her back to Theo, slipping out of her current shirt to change into another and same with her pajama bottoms and a skirt. "I'm just going to decide that my makeup from yesterday still looks okay." Rhea told him, rummaging through her closet until she found the other shoe, hidden between her many skirts. "Ready! Oh and I want Chinese. And no forks."

"Why don't you trust my taste?" Theo exclaimed incredulously. "I have awesome taste. If you let me buy you clothes you would be awesome too. Well, awesome-ish. You'd still have your personality." He winked, before folding his arms. "I would be well careful with your shoes. And my feet are not monster feet. Yours are just minuscule because you're a short-arse. Mmhmm."

Theo waited for her to get changed, averting his eyes so that he was looking out of the window, before turning back and smiling. "Good. I'm actually starving. Which Chinese? I vote Chopsticks. And yes. I'm too lazy for cutlery. Come along then, Cinder-Birthday Girl."

Rhea pulled a face at Theo. "You're a girly man, Theo. I do not trust you picking out my clothes, even if you're more into girly clothing than manly clothing. I can't be seen in the same stuff as you." she winked at him. "Though, you're welcome to borrow one of my skirts if you ever want to. I'm sure they'd flatter your long legs."

"You're paying, you know that?" Rhea opened the door, gesturing for Theo to go out first. "It's my birthday after all. And Chopsticks if fine." she rolled her eyes at him. "And then we should go buy me an expensive gift. Preferably something wearable. Or perfume."

"Ugh, I wouldn't dress you in boy's clothes, God Rhea, you're so dramatic," Theo said, rolling his eyes. "I am just really good at picking out outfits for girls. It's a gift. My girlfriend loved it. Bitch."

He smirked at her offer, before nodding. "Next Halloween maybe. I could go as Freddie Mercury. And aw, thanks babe, you really think so? I'm so pleased." He grinned and shoved his hands into his pockets, checking his phone briefly before leaving the door as she gestured, waiting for her to follow.

"Oh really? I was gonna make you pay, you know, cos I'm that much of a bastard," he told her with a serious voice, before smiling. "Ugh. Just don't pick anything too expensive."

"You'd dress me in ugly clothes. Or like the clothes you'd rather I'd wear. Like the stuff nuns wear." Rhea accused, giving her brother a look. Or at least Artemis would probably do that.

She closed the door, not bothering to lock - she never did anyway. "Are you spending your own money on me or Daddy's money?" she raised her eyebrows. "Perfume's are not that expensive." she pouted. "And I really need a new smell, my old one's started to bore me."

"I would never dress you in ugly clothes!" Theo defended himself, biting his lip to stop himself from grinning. He grinned too much. He was always grinning. Was this a problem? "Aw, I just really wanna go shopping and I'll pay so we're going shopping as soon as we eat the Chinese. And by that I mean the meal, not the nation. No arguments."

He smirked and rubbed at his neck, shrugging. "I always use my own money. And anyway, the only money of his I ever use is the stuff he gives me for my birthday or whatnot. Unless I have something boring to buy. Like schoolbooks. I'll use his dosh for that. And if I'm skint. You know I have minus seventy bucks in one of my accounts at the moment? I'm spending invisible money. Dad's gonna be piiiiiiissed."

Rhea sighed. "Fine. I'll go shopping with you. But if you buy something ugly I will burn it, Theo, burn it." she did need a few more clothes. She always needed clothes.

"Why do you use your money when you can use his money? Or is being Daddy's girl and not Daddy's boy paying off?" She grinned brightly. "Because Daddy keeps sending me money, I never have no money." she said in a sing song voice, grinning. "I hope he'll yell at you. What have you been spending money on? Alcohol? Cigarettes? Both?"

"Why would I ever buy something ugly?" Theo asked, rolling his eyes. "I ain't spending my money on any ugly shit, uh uh sister." He shook his hand, before dropping the impression and running down the hall, crashing through the door and spinning around with his hands in the air. "Victory!"

He sighed heavily and leant his head back impatiently as she teased him. "Ha ha, ha, ha, fuck off. Mind you, I swear his money is 'PLEEEEEASE THEO, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE FIND A GIRLFRIEND, I BEG OF YOU'. Or you know, something to that effect. Anyway, I'm like the androgynous one of us three, I swear. GENDERLESS. Just because Art's the model son and you're the favourite but whatever. I'm not jealous." He shoved his hands back into his pockets and whistled, before cutting himself off quickly. "What do you mean? I never drink. Much. And I did give smoking up, remember?" Until he met Lyssa. Oh, that girl was his downfall. Though he wasn't smoking til he felt sick any more, he did think he was getting back to that way.

"Because it would amuse you if I'd wear it? Not that I would wear anything ugly, I believe in tough love, so I'd just tell you out front if it's shit." she rolled her eyes before following her brother out the door. "You shouldn't be allowed in public, really."

"Maybe you should find a girlfriend. Or a boyfriend. Or both, I really don't care. You might become less whiney." she beamed at him. "I like being the favorite. I'm the prettiest anyway. And the only girl, so of course I should be the favorite. And the youngest. And daddy's angel. I'm the perfect daughter! Who deserves lot of money." she nodded her head.

Rhea gave Theo a look. "You know Artemis has decided we're alcoholics."

"Oh no, I am totally the prettiest," Theo retorted. "Have you seen me in make up? I actually rock it. And you know, I'm at least the most talented. Please give me that. I don't know what in but I want to be the most something."

"It wouldn't amuse me!" Theo whined, before sighing heavily. "No. I wouldn't ever force you to wear shit clothes. It would physically hurt me. Bad fashion sense is like kryptonite. God I need something manly, don't I? Do you have a Snickers bar on you?"

He snorted at what she said and shrugged. "I just kind of want a friend with benefits at the moment if I'm honest. Someone like Jensen Ackles. But anyway, let me take you shopping and then I won't whine. Otherwise I'll whine more!"

"You're the most gay one?" Rhea offered, smiling cheekily at him. "You're talented at drinking. Are you talented at sex?" she became thoughtful for a moment. "Do you think you're more into boys than I am? Like, I know I'm straight, and you're not gay persay, but I can act very lesbian-ish and you really gay-ish. It's a thought."

"Good! I'm okay with letting you pick-and pay for-amazing clothes. Though, clothes is a bit old for a birthday present, isn't it? Why can't you be more creative, Thee, I'm disappointed in you." she shook her head, before giving him a look. "Why on earth would I carry a Snickers bar on me?"

"Oooh, friends with benefits? I love those. I have those." she sighed a little dreamily. "You should get one, find a friend-or make a friend and then fuck them. Often. Problem solved. OKay, if you whine, I crucify you, deal?"

"Shut uuup," Theo replied, smacking her shoulder lightly with the back of his hand. "Mind you, I totally could go for that. And..." He tilted his head to the side thoughtfully. "I don't know really. I... Do I gossip more than you? Wait though, I've actually been in love with boys so maybe I am. Oh my God. I think I'be lost every dreg of masculinity."

"I could be more creative but a, I've frazzled my braincells over recreational misusages of my past, and two, b, whatever, I can't be arsed. Sorry. And Alyssa would have a Snickers bar on her. You've failed as a sister!"

"I could do that. I will advertise. And whining? What's that?" He clapped his hands together and span around happily, before slinging his arm around her shoulders and guiding her forwards. "So. Dresses or jeans and stuff? Or both? You never wear pants. You should try it. You'd look good."

"I'm officially going to start telling people I have one sister and one brother." Rhea said. "Though, I'm not sure if I approve of this. Are you trying to steal my spot as the Girl Capulet? Because I like being the only female siblings, boys like it too. Also, my place as Daddy's Princess is not up for grabs."

Rhea gave Theo a look. "I have no failed as a sister, you've failed as a brother. Years ago." she nodded. "I don't remember the last time I had a Snickers bar."

"'Fuck buddy wanted, will pay in sex and alcohol'?" Rhea offered, grinning before rolling her eyes up at her brother. "I want a dress. But if you're dyyyyiiing to buy me jeans, then I wan't both. I do own pants." she pouted a little. "I just prefer skirts. And dresses. Weren't we going to get chinese?"

"You do that," Theo said, smirking. "And you'll still be the baby. Plus I doubt I'd be Daddy's Little Princess. Particularly if I announced I wanted to be called Thea from now on. And I still wouldn't be straight! Thea and Rhea as well. That would be pretty cheesy. Yeah, I think I'll stick to being me, thanks."

"Okay, so chinese first, then shopping, then Snickers bars. Even though I hate Snickers. Maybe that's why I'm not the best example of a man ever. I don't really like Yorkie bars either. Funny." He grinned and pushed her forwards, before they reached his car and he opened the door for her. "See, I'm even going to drive so you can drink if you want to. Mind you, you are still five years under the legal age. Oh my God, Rhea, you're five years younger than you should be. Wow. That's mental. And you make me sound terrible, you know that?"

"Well, then, I'll just have to buy you both then. But don't expect anything for Christmas, okay?" he said as he climbed into the driver's seat and grinned at her. "Right. Do you trust me to get us there alive?"

"Thea and Rhea, if you'd be called that you'd be stealing my everything. I don't like that. You better stay as Theo." she nodded, before raising her eyebrows. "I thought you liked all kinds of candy and chocolate?"

"Oh. My. Gosh. Theo." Rhea sighed, slipping into the car and giving her brother a look. "I swear, bad things will happen if you start scolding me for being too young to drink. Also, it's my birthday today! Be. Nice!" she wanted to point out the fact that he was terrible and that she had a list of things he had done when he was just a small baby (teenager), but he'd promised her a lot of good stuff, she'd need the stuff first.

"What do you want for your birthday?" Rhea questioned. "Oh! I could get you a stripper-Wait, why didn't you get me a stripper?" she looked at Theo, and then the wheel. She reached for the seatbelt. "No, I don't."

"I would not be stealing your everything, you still have the bitchiest title!" Theo replied, grinning. "But still. I like my balls. Um. Did I just say that?"

He laughed and pulled the car into reverse, leaving the parking lot and heading towards the town (a little over the speed limit, mind). "Well. Clothes shopping. I have so many plans in mind, I tell you, Rhea. I've been saving this up for years."

"Sorry. I'll find you a stripper immediately. Oh my God, we should get Artie's roommate. Ha, that would be perfection. Can we?"

"I'll proudly hang onto that title." Rhea said, smirking. "Though you can be a bit of a bitch, yourself brother. But it looks better on me." she grimaced at his sentence. "Ew. Ew. I love my breasts."

Rhea frowned. "Is this car ride going to be my death? Because I'm only sixteen, today! I'd rather live." she wasn't sure if to be excited for shopping or not. "That's scary Theo, I'm scared. GEt female friends and take them shopping."

"Yes." Rhea nodded her head. "Artemis' roommate would be perfect. You're not allowed to go home with him though, the stripper is all mine."

"I am not a bitch," Theo exclaimed. "I am lovely. One hundred per cent. See my halo? It shines in your presence, trying to get it's all good aura to cleanse your filthy one. Yes. I am the model child! And I'm glad you love your breasts. Hopefully Artemis loves his abs or hair or some other wonderfully defining feature."

He laughed and shook his head. "It's not going to be your death. And anyway, I do have female friends, but they're not feminine. They're cool and have personalities and shit. Not that you don't have a personality or whatever. I mean like... I don't even know, I'm gonna stop talking now."

He grinned as she nodded and raised his eyebrows. "Fine by me. But that boy is stupidly pretty. I would. I think half the school would to be honest."

"You're so full of shit." Rhea shook her head. "Honestly, half the time I don't know what to say to you. Also, you talk to much. Angel's don't talk as much as you do, shush."

"You're feminine though," Rhea pointed out. "Shouldn't you have super girly friends? So you can gush about boys with them and whatnot." she gave him a little glare but decided to ignore his last part of his sentence.

"I'm not sure if Artie'd appreciate us going for Radley." Rhea grinned. "But honestly, that boy is fiiiiiine. I think he should walk around shirtless, really, it would look good on him."

"I have you to gush about boys with though," Theo replied with a shrug. "I also have quite a stealthy collection of effeminate yet very straight male friends of which to drink beer with and discuss girls, so that's all good."

"Ah, who cares?" he said, grinning as he pulled into the town carpark, raising his eyebrows at the fee it would cost for a few hours. "It doesn't really matter because I mean you can appreciate someone without going after them. I mean, there are so many actors I think are pretty damn beautiful, but I wouldn't go after them because I'm not a stalker. Totally the same."

"Right. I'm starving. Come on, let's go get a seat because if we can't eat I'll either cry or eat a pedestrian and the latter I might regret."